by Matthew B. Frisch
You should be your own best friend. In fact, you have to be. To be kind to yourself is to be happy in life. In other words, if you aren’t happy with yourself, how can you be happy at all? After all, it is through yourself that you experience the world, and it is through yourself that others interact with you. The energy you give off is the energy you receive, and the energy you give off starts with how you view yourself.
So, an important first step in being kind to yourself is getting to know yourself. That way you can know exactly what there is to be proud of! What is your personality like? Certainly, you are a strong person in some sense. What are your strengths? It is important to first start with your strengths and all your positive traits; that way, you’ll feel more confident in yourself to manage your weaknesses.
You might be one of many people who struggles in some form or fashion with low self-esteem. God knows I am one of them (for lack of a better saying). This is not your fault - it is society’s! If not society then it’s a result of your upbringing, which I think is largely determined by society in addition to friends, family, and personal experiences - good and bad. You may have low self-esteem because you were not given enough positive praise growing up. Or perhaps you weren’t given enough attention by your parents in general. Or perhaps maybe your parents scolded you too harshly too often. In my case, it is difficult because I don’t have many things in my life I am proud of.
I guess you can say I am proud of taking the time to write this article. After all, I’m doing this for me. If it can help anyone else out in the process, that is all the better; but I’m doing this for me. Know that low self-worth and low self-confidence are not logical problems to have. They don’t deserve your attention or energy. Sometimes you have to follow some of Mel Robbins’ advice and tell yourself, “I am not going to talk about that!” Even if it is a constant struggle, it is always worth the fight.
So before you try to be best friends with someone else or get into any kind of meaningful relationship, become best friends and in a positive relationship with yourself. And know that you are not alone and that you are worth it! Don’t be afraid to be irrationally self-positive either; just do what it takes to be happy and be as selfish as you want to be about it! Because you deserve it! :)